INTJ and ESTJ Relationship

Learn about Myers-Briggs types and relationships

INTJ

What is an INTJ Personality Type
(The Intellectual)?
People with an INTJ personality type tend to be confident, analytical, and ambitious in their behavior. They love to pursue knowledge and tend to be very logically minded. They are independent thinkers focused on solving the world’s problems.

ESTJ

What is an ESTJ Personality Type
(The Commander)?
People with an ESTJ personality type tend to be organized, loyal, and hard-working in their behavior. They are good, law-abiding citizens with a desire to lead. They are very principled and thrive when they are helping and encouraging others to follow a set of beliefs and values.

Communication

How can INTJ and ESTJ types communicate effectively with each other?

INTJs and ESTJs are both Thinking and Judging personalities, meaning they prefer to base decisions on logical thinking and follow plans to achieve set goals. However, INTJs prefer to be alone and think about how things are connected, while ESTJs enjoy being with others and trusting present details. INTJs should avoid pushing ESTJs to focus on the big picture, while ESTJs should allow INTJs to have plenty of space by communicating primarily through email.


Resolving Conflict

How can INTJ and ESTJ types resolve conflict?

INTJs and ESTJs are both logical thinkers and should address conflict directly. INTJs should be conscious of ESTJs’ need to address the details of a situation, while ESTJs should recognize INTJs’ desire to build connections between experiences. Both should share their thoughts openly and work toward a mutually beneficial solution.


Building Trust

How can INTJ and ESTJ types build trust?

INTJs are likely to trust ESTJs who can recognize when to give others space; ESTJs should be conscious of INTJs energy levels to avoid pushing them too far outside of their comfort zone.

ESTJs tend to trust INTJs who engage in deeper discussion; ESTJs will depend on INTJs who abide by rules and regulations.

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Working Together

How can INTJ and ESTJ types work together?

Both INTJs and ESTJs are rational and organized. INTJs bring creative problem-solving to a workplace, while ESTJs bring a practical perception and charisma. INTJs can help ESTJs understand the overall goal of a project, while ESTJs can help INTJs pay attention to smaller tasks.


Dealing with Change

How can INTJ and ESTJ types deal with change?

INTJs and ESTJs don’t tend to be naturally flexible and may have a challenging time adapting to a new circumstance. They tend to follow set plans in their everyday lives and see unexpected change as an obstacle to overcome. INTJs and ESTJs should work with new developments and create a plan to work with the change, rather than against it.  


Managing Stress

INTJ and ESTJ types need to seek to understand what brings stress to the other type and should try to avoid causing it when possible.

INTJ types are easily stressed by...

  • Spending too much time around others
  • Obstacles that interrupt their plans
  • Focusing on specifics and details
  • Being vulnerable around new people

ESTJ types are easily stressed by...

  • Disorganization and chaos around them
  • Inconsistent relationships with others
  • Emotional or vulnerable situations
  • Unfamiliar experiences and unexpected change

INTJs should avoid speaking conceptually around ESTJs, as they prefer addressing concrete facts.

ESTJs should avoid pressuring INTJs to think about small details, as this can frustrate or overwhelm them.


Encouraging and Motivating

INTJ and ESTJ types can encourage and motivate each other in their personal and professional lives.

INTJ types are motivated by...

  • Achieving personal and professional goals
  • Making positive contributions to their work environment
  • Thinking up new and creative solutions
  • Taking time to be alone

ESTJ types are motivated by...

  • Ethical, inspiring action from others
  • Time spent with the people they love
  • Strong and admirable leadership
  • Establishing a routine or tradition

INTJs can motivate ESTJs by spending one-on-one time with them.

ESTJs can encourage INTJs by recognizing their creative thinking and allowing them to take time to recharge alone.


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