Type 5 and Type 8 Relationship

Learn about Enneagram types and relationships

thought

What is Enneagram Type 5
(The Thinker)?
People with an Enneagram type Five personality tend to be curious, independent, and observant in their behavior. They love to pursue knowledge and seek a deeper understanding of the world around them. They often prefer privacy and time alone to think, which may lead them to withdraw from others.

shield

What is Enneagram Type 8
(The Protector)?
People with an Enneagram type Eight personality tend to be self-confident, powerful, and assertive in their behavior. They love engaging in debates and are skilled at making difficult decisions. They are fiercely independent and hate being reliant on others.

Communication

How can Fives and Eights communicate effectively with each other?

Enneagram Fives are motivated by the desire to feel useful and competent, while Eights are driven by the need to remain in control of their own lives.

Fives should be direct and clear when addressing Eights.

Eights should be calm and concise around Fives, allowing them plenty of space to recharge.


Resolving Conflict

How can Fives and Eights resolve conflict?

Fives and Eights should work through issues logically. Fives need to express their perspective openly and stand their ground. Eights should listen closely to Fives, without interrupting; they should then express their own viewpoint calmly. Both personalities should be patient and level-headed while working toward a relatively peaceful settlement.


Building Trust

How can Fives and Eights build trust?

Fives tend to trust Eights who are rational and intellectual. Eights should give Fives plenty of personal space.

Eights are likely to trust Fives who can be open and firm. Fives should engage in occasional debate or discussion of an interesting issue.

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Working Together

How can Fives and Eights work together?

Fives tend to be curious and reserved, while Eights are generally assertive and outspoken.

Fives bring knowledge and deep thinking to a workplace; they can help Eights consider multiple ideas before making a decision.

Eights offer practical ideas and fair, balanced directing to a work environment. Eights can help Fives advocate firmly for their own ideas.


Dealing with Change

How can Fives and Eights deal with change?

Fives don’t tend to be negatively affected by change unless it harms or impacts their personal space or independence.

Eights may be negatively affected by change if it disturbs their personal freedom and control.


Managing Stress

Fives and Eights need to seek to understand what brings stress to the other type and should try to avoid causing it when possible.

Fives are easily stressed by...

  • Large groups of unfamiliar people
  • Emotional expressions and situations
  • Being required to meet other people’s needs
  • Overstimulation or lack of peace

Eights are easily stressed by...

  • Being controlled by or subordinate to others
  • Feeling unimportant or insignificant
  • Facing vulnerable or emotional situations
  • Feeling out of control or helpless

Fives should avoid withdrawing completely from Eights, though Eights need to allow Fives plenty of space to reenergize.


Encouraging and Motivating

Fives and Eights can encourage and motivate each other in their personal and professional lives.

Fives are motivated by...

  • Discovering something new about the world
  • Alone time to think and reconnect with themselves
  • Learning a new skill or technique
  • Feeling valued, able, and appreciated

Eights are motivated by...

  • Taking charge and leading others
  • Feeling free, understood, and respected
  • Making decisions that help other people
  • Logical and practical ideas and solutions

Fives can motivate Eights by engaging in a discussion or debate.

Eights can excite Fives by recognizing and affirming their skills and knowledge.


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