Type 5 and Type 9 Relationship

Learn about Enneagram types and relationships

thought

What is Enneagram Type 5
(The Thinker)?
People with an Enneagram type Five personality tend to be curious, independent, and observant in their behavior. They love to pursue knowledge and seek a deeper understanding of the world around them. They often prefer privacy and time alone to think, which may lead them to withdraw from others.

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What is Enneagram Type 9
(The Peacekeeper)?
People with an Enneagram type Nine personality tend to be accepting, optimistic, and adaptive in their behavior. They like peace and tend to avoid conflict. They tend to enjoy time alone or with smaller groups of people.

Communication

How can Fives and Nines communicate effectively with each other?

Enneagram Fives are motivated by a need to feel useful and competent, while Nines are driven by a desire for peace. Fives should be sensitive but clear when communicating with Nines. Nines should focus on being direct with Fives while allowing them plenty of space to recharge.


Resolving Conflict

How can Fives and Nines resolve conflict?

Nines tend to avoid confrontation, which may make it difficult for them to share their true feelings. Fives should help start the discussion by calmly addressing the situation, sharing their point of view, and encouraging Nines to be honest. Nines should communicate their own experience, thoughts, and feelings without fear of reproach. Fives should be patient with Nines as they work together to solve the problem.


Building Trust

How can Fives and Nines build trust?

Fives tend to trust Nines who are intellectual, independent, and relaxed. Nines should try to be aware of the difference between when Fives want to discuss ideas and when they need plenty of space to be alone.

Nines are likely to trust Fives who are complimentary and nonjudgmental. Fives should avoid criticizing Nines, focusing, instead, on creating an environment in which Nines can share their ideas, thoughts, and feelings without fear of conflict.

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Working Together

How can Fives and Nines work together?

Fives tend to be logical and curious, while Nines are generally peaceful and easygoing.

Fives bring practical solutions and an array of knowledge to a work environment; they can help Nines be more objective and rational when making decisions.

Nines offer patience and stability to their workplace. Nines can help Fives feel more comfortable and at ease around others.


Dealing with Change

How can Fives and Nines deal with change?

Fives don’t tend to be negatively affected by change unless it harms or impacts their personal space or independence.

Nines tend to seem adaptable but may experience discomfort with change if it disrupts their internal peace. Nines who are negatively affected are likely to adjust well after finding an appropriate solution.


Managing Stress

Fives and Nines need to seek to understand what brings stress to the other type and should try to avoid causing it when possible.

Fives are easily stressed by...

  • Large groups of unfamiliar people
  • Emotional expressions and situations
  • Being required to meet other people’s needs
  • Overstimulation or lack of peace

Nines are easily stressed by...

  • Disappointing those they love
  • Needing to make difficult decisions
  • Being interrupted or ignored
  • Pent-up and unexpressed emotion

Fives should avoid criticizing Nines, while Nines should avoid over stimulating or crowding Fives.


Encouraging and Motivating

Fives and Nines can encourage and motivate each other in their personal and professional lives.

Fives are motivated by...

  • Discovering something new about the world
  • Alone time to think and reconnect with themselves
  • Learning a new skill or technique
  • Feeling valued, able, and appreciated

Nines are motivated by...

  • Stability and consistency in their personal life
  • Helping to bring two groups together
  • Resolving others’ personal tensions
  • Feeling safe, accepted, and heard

Fives can motivate Nines by encouraging them to express themselves more openly.

Nines can excite Fives by listening to and affirming them when they share extensively about a topic of interest.


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